Showing posts with label Illinois. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Illinois. Show all posts

Sunday, April 8, 2018

BIGFOOT CSI is on the loose!

It's finally out! BIGFOOT CSI is the novel I've been working on for way longer than I care to admit. I started it years ago, before we even moved away from Illinois, then things got busy when we got to our new home in Georgia. Poor Bigfoot was pushed to the side too many times. I even finished a couple other projects in the meantime and published the adult novels SAUCY GIRL and DEAD GIRLS DON'T GET FAT.

No matter what happened, I couldn't stop thinking about Sasquatch. It was like he was lurking in the woods of my subconscious, waiting to stroll across the path when I least expected it--and when I happened to be without a decent camera--just like a typical cryptid.


So I buckled down and finished the book. Now it's published, and the whole world can read it! Please, Whole World, read it!

This is a funny, exciting novel about 16-year-old Piper O'Connell who has just learned that she's part of a secret sisterhood of girls and women who are born with the skills to protect the race of bigfoot from human hunters who seek to expose them. The job is dangerous, the hours stink, and Piper gets paid in trinkets like dead animal parts and shiny stones. The only perk is her tall, dark, handsome, and genetically complicated partner, Sam. Piper is intrigued by him, but she's reluctant to meet his mom, who's 7 feet tall and lives with a pod of other bigfoot in the Georgia mountains.

Piper is kept busy "scrubbing" the bodies of dead bigfoot near her small town of Senoia, Georgia, and she must solve the mystery of who is killing the creatures before her friends--and maybe even Piper herself--become the murderer's next victims.

Please check out BIGFOOT CSI and please write a review on Amazon and/or Goodreads. This book is the perfect companion for those long, cold vigils in the woods waiting for Bigfoot to show himself. Enjoy!

Monday, January 29, 2018

Illinois Roadtrip with Mothman and Bigfoot



You know how your hometown always seems dull and sleepy? That's even true when your hometown is a big city like Chicago. In my case, it seemed like nothing exciting went on in Chicago when I was growing up there, but now that we've moved away, my city has gone and gotten more interesting. It's gotten so interesting that Mothman decided to start hanging around there.

Mothman is one of those creatures like Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster that many people claim to have seen, but for which convincing physical proof has yet to be found. Mothman was originally seen in West Virginia decades ago, and some believe his presence signaled impending disaster in the form of a bridge collapse. Anyway, in December, 2017, more than 50 Chicagoans claimed to have spotted a Mothman-type creature in the Chicagoland area.  We have to hope that his presence doesn't mean disaster for the Windy City. https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/paqv9z/mothman-sightings-in-chicago

In addition to Mothman lurking around Chicago, another semi-mythical creature has recently been spotted in Illinois. According to Cryptozoology News, a red-headed Bigfoot was hanging around south of Chicago. Was he—like so many others—just looking for Mothman? It's impossible to say. http://cryptozoologynews.com/red-bigfoot-spotted-illinois/

The problem with these sightings is, of course, that they didn't happen when I still lived in Illinois. With my forthcoming novel Sasquatch CSI on my mind, I've been indulging my interest in cryptozoology (i.e. the study of creatures like Bigfoot). The stories are fascinating, and I look forward to doing more research. In the meantime, I might need to plan a trip home to visit the family in Illinois. As research for the next book, it's tax deductible, right?

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

The Day We Fled Illinois


The Day We Fled Illinois

It's been a ridiculously long time since I've posted a blog, but I've got an excuse. And it's not one of those lame made-up excuses like "My dog ate my homework," or "The president's motorcade stopped me to ask for directions to the airport." I just moved from Illinois where I'd lived my whole life under a regime of prison-bound governors to the Great State of Georgia where the overalls are baggy and the grits are homemade. Am I worried about this major life change? If you've read any of the fretting blogs here, you know the answer to that. But it's also kind of exciting. And it seemed like the timing was right, both for the move itself and for our escape from Illinois on Saturday, June 1.
Why did we choose Georgia? My husband was offered a relocation at his work, so we decided to take them up on the adventure. Since our son's in college, we didn't have to worry about making him change schools, and we were 100% ready to never live through another Northern Illinois winter. So it was off to Georgia with four annoyed cats and a bunch of winter parkas that we refused to get rid of because we don't quite believe that it doesn't snow down here.

We were planning to leave on a Saturday morning, so the movers came and took away our furniture Friday. Without beds at our house, we decided to stay Friday night in a hotel. As we drove past the high school next door to our house, I saw a line of porta-potties in the parking lot.
"Do you suppose tomorrow's that charity run?" I asked my husband. Every summer since we'd been in that house, there had been a charity run that started at the high school, blasting music from the 80s and 90s through our windows at 6 a.m. on a Saturday morning. That's one thing I definitely wouldn't miss about our old house, and it seemed fitting that it would be happening on the day we were leaving.

"No!" my husband cried in horror. "We'll never get out of here tomorrow morning!" That's when I remembered the other associated inconvenience that came hand-in-hand with the charity run.
The police shut down our road before the race and it stays closed until the last pathetic straggler has completed the whole course. It takes hours. During which time we're not allowed to pull a car out of our driveway. So our plans to leave Saturday morning were just shot through the butt. Unless…

"If we can get out of the house really early tomorrow, we might be able to beat the road shut-down," my husband suggested.
"What time are we talking about here?" I asked nervously.

So we went to our favorite pizza place one last time before leaving town to consider our options. And sure enough, when we walked in, we came face-to-face with a bunch of people wearing charity race t-shirts. They were signing up late participants. We asked when the road was being closed the next morning. We were told 7:45 a.m. It was harsh, but at least we had a goal for our escape.

The next morning, we woke up at 5:00 a.m. and were down in our hotel lobby for the free breakfast when it opened at 6:00 a.m. By 6:30 we were back at our house. Of course, Michael Jackson tunes were blasting from speakers next door at the high school parking lot. But we didn't have time to think about that. We only had an hour, or we'd be trapped and we might not check into our hotel in Clarksville, Tennessee until midnight.
I handled the four cats: Feed them, clean litter boxes, put litter boxes into big plastic garbage bags and toss them in my car, give sedatives to the cats who weren't too old to handle the drugs, then capture them all and stuff them into their cat carriers.

My husband handled everything else: Clean out the fridge, last minute cleaning out of cabinets and drawers, sealing up the suitcases. We had thought we'd have plenty of time to do all this on Saturday morning, but that was before we knew the swarm of locusts…I mean charity-minded individuals…was about to descend upon our street and render us immobile for hours.
Everything was crammed into our two cars and we jumped into the drivers' seats. As we pulled out of our driveway one last time, we could see them coming. The runners were setting off early – it was only 7:30 a.m. – and the police were leading the way as they approached with their barricades for the road. As we put them in our rearview mirrors, it felt like the villagers were running us out of town with their pitchforks and torches. What a perfect way to take our leave of Illinois.

About a mile away, my husband and I pulled over to set our GPSs and make sure we hadn't forgotten anything vital, like one of the cats. But we were all there, and the drugged cats were already nodding off.
Six hours after racing out of what had been our hometown for the past 10 years ahead of a sweaty mob, we crossed the border into Kentucky. At the gas station, I realized the parking permit from the job I'd had to quit in order to relocate was still dangling from the rearview mirror. With a huge grin on my face, I tore it off and tossed it in the trash.

Time for a new adventure in Georgia…

Friday, October 5, 2012

New ghost story: Warning Signs

Need something to get you in the mood for Halloween? I've just posted my first ebook short story, and in honor of the season, it's scary!
Maybe the house's new owner should have asked questions about why the place was so cheap, but she loved it and thought that remodeling it would be the perfect distraction from her failed marriage. That's when the disturbances started. Are the locals right about a ghost driving away the house's previous owners? Or is there another danger lurking in the turn-of-the century home?
Check out Warning Signs at Smashwords or Amazon. http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/242569
Boo!

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Goodbye, Summer! Hello, New Book!


This summer, we had multiple 100+ degree days in northern Illinois, but I enjoyed soaking up the heat and loved every minute of it. Just as long as my air conditioning continued to work, that is. But now there's only one more week of summer until autumn officially starts, and it's pretty depressing. Autumn is beautiful, but it inevitably leads to winter, and winter in northern Illinois isn't a thing I'd wish on anyone.

Have you ever put on an extra pair of pants and an ankle-length parka just to walk down to the mailbox? Have you ever climbed into your car through the hatchback because the other doors were frozen shut?  Have you ever found a mole in your basement, but you felt sorry for him because it was so cold outside, so you dug a cozy nest for him in a pile of leaves in the yard? No? Then you've never lived here. I know, right now all you hardcore residents of Minnesota and North Dakota are laughing at the wimpy Illinoisan (or Flatlander, as Wisconsin residents call us), but all this flat land really allows the wind to work up a head of steam, and it gets miserable.

Anyway, needless to say, I don't want winter to come, but this year it's not as simple as all that. This year, a part of me actually wants winter to come because I'm eager for the January 8, 2013 release of my book I SAW YOUR FUTURE AND HE'S NOT IT: A PSYCHIC'S GUIDE TO TRUE LOVE. Would I be less conflicted if it came out in June or July, so I could just wish for summer? Sure, but in this case, this book is scheduled for January because it's right before Valentine's Day.

The thinking is that I SAW YOUR FUTURE would make a great Valentine's gift to give your friend who's overdue to get rid of her creepy boyfriend. (Subtle hints often don't work because they're too subtle.) It's also a book a woman can pick up for herself in an effort to find a new guy to spend Valentine's Day with. This is also just a funny, interesting read for somebody who would like entertaining stories about other women's successes and failures in the romance department. So, yes, a wintertime release is the best timing, but it still leaves me clinging desperately to summer – together with my shorts, sandals, and tomato vines – while looking forward to an exciting event in January.

In fact, a January release might be the best timing of all. January and February are usually miserable in this part of the world, with dark, cold days and nothing fun to look forward to, but in 2013 that won't be the case. Book promotion activities and the excitement of the new release should brighten up those two months.

That's it, I'm convinced. This year, bring on winter! But let's make it a mild one, OK? Oh, and those Mayans better be wrong about the world ending on December 22, because if that happens only two weeks before my release date, someone's getting an angry letter from yours truly.